my mom and i took lu to get her first pair of walking shoes today. she's not walking yet but i do think she will start at any time and i thought it would be nice to outfit her in a nice set of kicks.
well, she is going through another high anxiety stage, which translates into she totally loses her sh*t around strangers. you would have thought the shoe store employees were drawing blood the way she acted when they measured her feet (size 3.5). putting the shoes on was even worse, her feet curled in such fury i couldn't even put the mini-orthopedic looking shoes on her. and yes they were indeed rather ugly stride rite shoes, but my mom assured me we're not going for style here, but practicality and function.
ended up we didn't even end up getting a pair because the saleswoman advised us to wait until she was actually walking and then come back. nice quality customer service if i don't say so myself. so we ended up empty handed this time, but soon will go back.
like i said, i do think she'll be walking soon. she's standing alone and taking mini steps toward me before she dives at my in hysterics (the good kind). however, i also said 6 months ago i thought she was getting a tooth and she's still as gummy as can be!
we will see...
Friday, July 31, 2009
this is awesome
trav and i cracked up so hard at the below clip. now, we both were known to skip church and we got caught. an instance that stands out is when a friend and i went to mcdonald's for an icecream cone, then proceeded to drive around for an hour to skip the service. well, it just so happened we pulled up to a stop light and we turned to our left and saw my dad. BUSTED. what made it worse was my friend was driving my car (the wood paneled "grocery getter!") and i was enjoying my cone in the passenger seat.
but hey dad, at least we were of age to drive!
but hey dad, at least we were of age to drive!
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Wednesday, July 29, 2009
communication
lucia has taken to picking up any object and putting it up to her ear like it's a phone. i don't think this is cute. in fact, it made me almost cry.
i think i was a bit emotional, but it breaks my heart that she has picked up on her mama being on the phone and knows how to hold it up to her ear.
i work too much. i take too many phone calls. conference calls are second nature.
i am going to try to change this because i think it sucks. my daughter's felt vegetables should not be mistaken as phones.
i need to disconnect!
i think i was a bit emotional, but it breaks my heart that she has picked up on her mama being on the phone and knows how to hold it up to her ear.
i work too much. i take too many phone calls. conference calls are second nature.
i am going to try to change this because i think it sucks. my daughter's felt vegetables should not be mistaken as phones.
i need to disconnect!
Monday, July 27, 2009
i have a new blog
not sure why when i typed the title of this blog the tune of "i wanna new drug" popped into my head "i have a new blog, one that won't make me sick..."
ANYWAY, i do indeed have a new blog. an additional one. it's a little experiment of mine so if you love good music, please follow it. i plan on posting mixes, great cd's, songs of the day, songs from my past, etc. tell your friends!
would love to have you follow me on over
HERE!
ANYWAY, i do indeed have a new blog. an additional one. it's a little experiment of mine so if you love good music, please follow it. i plan on posting mixes, great cd's, songs of the day, songs from my past, etc. tell your friends!
would love to have you follow me on over
HERE!
reader's digest- yes it is me
i'm quoted along with my mom in a recent reader's digest article about kids living in a bubble. i read it via google alert this morning. (yes i do get google alerts on myself to see when client's are placed and when. it sounds awful, to have a google alert on yourself, but i do in the name of business. i swear.)
here it is, i can't link to it for some reason: http://www.rd.com/living-healthy/bubble-babies/article150007.html
anyway, i originally had contacted this writer to pitch a former client of mine that makes temporary tattoos for kids if they are to become separated from a parent in a crowded place. they have a spot to write your cell phone number within the tattoo. i don't want to link to them because they stopped paying our retainer and i don't want to give them any free PR. i digress...
so anyway, this woman who runs the site freerangekids.com interviewed me and seemed pretty cool. she formed the movement free range kids, encouraging us parents to stop being such crazy hoverers and to just let our kids live like we did. i started following her site but am no longer. i do agree that a lot of us are over the top in our parenting. myself included. but the people on her site (including the reporter herself) are just too snarky and oftentimes rude for my liking. plus i believe i was misquoted a bit in the piece.
as you know, i've adopted the philosophy of being as least judgmental as i can be as a mom and toward other moms. let's just say her site doesn't promote that philosophy.
and i don't have room for that kind of petty negativity in my life!
here it is, i can't link to it for some reason: http://www.rd.com/living-healthy/bubble-babies/article150007.html
anyway, i originally had contacted this writer to pitch a former client of mine that makes temporary tattoos for kids if they are to become separated from a parent in a crowded place. they have a spot to write your cell phone number within the tattoo. i don't want to link to them because they stopped paying our retainer and i don't want to give them any free PR. i digress...
so anyway, this woman who runs the site freerangekids.com interviewed me and seemed pretty cool. she formed the movement free range kids, encouraging us parents to stop being such crazy hoverers and to just let our kids live like we did. i started following her site but am no longer. i do agree that a lot of us are over the top in our parenting. myself included. but the people on her site (including the reporter herself) are just too snarky and oftentimes rude for my liking. plus i believe i was misquoted a bit in the piece.
as you know, i've adopted the philosophy of being as least judgmental as i can be as a mom and toward other moms. let's just say her site doesn't promote that philosophy.
and i don't have room for that kind of petty negativity in my life!
Saturday, July 25, 2009
the worst
luci had her one year check up this past week. she weighs 18 lbs 8 oz and is 27 inches tall. (i think i'm right on the height)
she had two shots and only two because i'm sticking with the spaced out schedule. every time she has vaccines, i am sickly nervous. it's awful watching my daughter in pain and being pricked, but it's not just that. it's the controversy surrounding vaccines and autism and side effects that makes me shudder in fear.
we decided to do a spaced out schedule basically because my mom really pushed me toward that. having been a special education teacher for over 30 years and now a teacher consultant for infants and small children, she's seen the rise of autism over the years. it was one thing she really was adamant about me doing, and i didn't think twice.
what i do think twice about is getting the vaccines in general. i knew we were going to, becuase i think NOT getting them would make me more nervous, so we opted into using an alternate schedule. and, it still makes me nervous.
i know most doctors scoff at the alternate schedule, so i found one that wouldn't. (not easy around here by the way.) i know how they feel though. when a client suggests a pitch i hadn't thought of, or tries to give me advice on a campaign, i get a little put off too. i mean what the hell, I'M THE EXPERT, not them. however, when i step back a little, i realize that just because they are paying me, doesn't mean that they can't have a rational marketing thought in their heads too. i can't think of everything. sometimes we all need a little help.
sure you can't really compare a doctor to a PR rep, but what makes me stand out from my clients is that i got a degree in journalism while most of them didn't. same for a doctor.
please, i'm not even saying i'm on the same level. but what i am saying is doctor's are human beings too with more schooling than the average person. we can't take everything they say to be the end all be all. when it comes to our kids, we have to educate ourselves too.
i don't begrudge those that don't vaccinate, and i don't look down on those that go balls to the wall with the full schedule per the doctor's orders. i just know what is best for us, and i'm going with it!
she had two shots and only two because i'm sticking with the spaced out schedule. every time she has vaccines, i am sickly nervous. it's awful watching my daughter in pain and being pricked, but it's not just that. it's the controversy surrounding vaccines and autism and side effects that makes me shudder in fear.
we decided to do a spaced out schedule basically because my mom really pushed me toward that. having been a special education teacher for over 30 years and now a teacher consultant for infants and small children, she's seen the rise of autism over the years. it was one thing she really was adamant about me doing, and i didn't think twice.
what i do think twice about is getting the vaccines in general. i knew we were going to, becuase i think NOT getting them would make me more nervous, so we opted into using an alternate schedule. and, it still makes me nervous.
i know most doctors scoff at the alternate schedule, so i found one that wouldn't. (not easy around here by the way.) i know how they feel though. when a client suggests a pitch i hadn't thought of, or tries to give me advice on a campaign, i get a little put off too. i mean what the hell, I'M THE EXPERT, not them. however, when i step back a little, i realize that just because they are paying me, doesn't mean that they can't have a rational marketing thought in their heads too. i can't think of everything. sometimes we all need a little help.
sure you can't really compare a doctor to a PR rep, but what makes me stand out from my clients is that i got a degree in journalism while most of them didn't. same for a doctor.
please, i'm not even saying i'm on the same level. but what i am saying is doctor's are human beings too with more schooling than the average person. we can't take everything they say to be the end all be all. when it comes to our kids, we have to educate ourselves too.
i don't begrudge those that don't vaccinate, and i don't look down on those that go balls to the wall with the full schedule per the doctor's orders. i just know what is best for us, and i'm going with it!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
whole milk= raging dialeelee?
this week luci has went from hard solid pooping to explosive dia-lee-lee.
all i can think is that it's got to be the whole milk i started introducing? i'm starting to wean her and have introduced milk in a cup during the day. she's had "loose stools" the past two days. i called the doc (whom we ironically enough had our one year appt with yesterday but this was prior to her raging bowels) and she said just to ease up on the milk until it passes. she's acting fine, just ripping them like a man and totally filling her pants!
anyone else have problems when introducing milk to their babies? (even though technically lucia is now a "toddler" she will be my "baby" until she's two!)
i am a bit sad about weaning her of course, but at the same time i can't describe how liberating it was today to not have to pump while she was away at jane's. i'm still nursing her morning and night, but will most likely wean from those two feedings within the next month. i am all about extended nursing and those who choose to do it. i myself am just ready to have my body back. she hasn't been affected at all by the elimination of the daytime feedings (aside from having the runs), but i'm talking in an emotional sense. i think it will be harder on me but so far, i'm ok.
it's been a wonderful experience and i will miss it when it's all said and done.
and that means she's just one more step away...
all i can think is that it's got to be the whole milk i started introducing? i'm starting to wean her and have introduced milk in a cup during the day. she's had "loose stools" the past two days. i called the doc (whom we ironically enough had our one year appt with yesterday but this was prior to her raging bowels) and she said just to ease up on the milk until it passes. she's acting fine, just ripping them like a man and totally filling her pants!
anyone else have problems when introducing milk to their babies? (even though technically lucia is now a "toddler" she will be my "baby" until she's two!)
i am a bit sad about weaning her of course, but at the same time i can't describe how liberating it was today to not have to pump while she was away at jane's. i'm still nursing her morning and night, but will most likely wean from those two feedings within the next month. i am all about extended nursing and those who choose to do it. i myself am just ready to have my body back. she hasn't been affected at all by the elimination of the daytime feedings (aside from having the runs), but i'm talking in an emotional sense. i think it will be harder on me but so far, i'm ok.
it's been a wonderful experience and i will miss it when it's all said and done.
and that means she's just one more step away...
i hate it when
people say "i love to laugh" when describing themselves. i mean, who doesn't???? i'm not going to say "i love having a terrible time." good grief.
also, it grinds me when people say "i love him to death." that just sounds creepy to me.
a while back my mom and i laughed hysterically over our pet peeves. now my friend teresko and i send emails to each other announcing our favorite pet peeves and new ones are always rolling out.
a few more:
-when people say "i hate going to funerals/the hospital/anywhere awful that nobody likes." or even worse "i can't handle it." oh wait, i forgot, I LOVE FUNERALS or visiting someone sick in the hospital.
-the word retarded. it's like nails on a chalkboard for me.
-when people talk or type like this: BEST. DAY. EVER. like they are so cool they have to pause between words for emphasis.
-when people say "oh that's so funny" when you're telling a story but don't laugh. really? if it's so funny WHY AREN'T YOU LAUGHING???
-jokes. i hate them. i always have to fake laugh at them and they just make me uncomfortable.
-i'll take it a step further. racial jokes. SO. NOT. FUNNY. (yes i did that on purpose)
-if you read my blog you know i hate it when people say "i'm so busy!" or "life's been so crazy!" seriously, because I've been just sitting over here doing nothing. yeah!
i'm sure i could go on but i just wanted to get those few out there. i just amused myself. i'm "so funny" but yet am not laughing.
also, it grinds me when people say "i love him to death." that just sounds creepy to me.
a while back my mom and i laughed hysterically over our pet peeves. now my friend teresko and i send emails to each other announcing our favorite pet peeves and new ones are always rolling out.
a few more:
-when people say "i hate going to funerals/the hospital/anywhere awful that nobody likes." or even worse "i can't handle it." oh wait, i forgot, I LOVE FUNERALS or visiting someone sick in the hospital.
-the word retarded. it's like nails on a chalkboard for me.
-when people talk or type like this: BEST. DAY. EVER. like they are so cool they have to pause between words for emphasis.
-when people say "oh that's so funny" when you're telling a story but don't laugh. really? if it's so funny WHY AREN'T YOU LAUGHING???
-jokes. i hate them. i always have to fake laugh at them and they just make me uncomfortable.
-i'll take it a step further. racial jokes. SO. NOT. FUNNY. (yes i did that on purpose)
-if you read my blog you know i hate it when people say "i'm so busy!" or "life's been so crazy!" seriously, because I've been just sitting over here doing nothing. yeah!
i'm sure i could go on but i just wanted to get those few out there. i just amused myself. i'm "so funny" but yet am not laughing.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
the big party
our diamond themed cake "luci in the sky with diamonds." check out the tangerine sky and boat on the river. you can see the sides but she created yellow and green flowers to represent "cellophane flowers of yellow and green." i also made yellow and green flower sugar cookies along with diamonds, stars and hearts.
this one year old wants some cake!
excuse the sheen of my forehead.
not sure quite what to make of her cupcake.
a one year old realizing there is nothing quite like a little cake and milk.
the birthday party was a success. no tears were had until the ride home. trav and had driven separately because he had a bachelor party the night before. i stayed at my parents preparing for it, cooking and baking (side note: found a new delish mac salad HERE that i'll def make again.) i was exhausted after the festivities so i let trav take luci home because you know, you just can't relax with a baby in the car because at any given moment, she could flip. i wanted to listen to some music and relax. for some reason i took the car trav had driven over in (we share) and he had a christmas mix i made and the song "winter song" was on. i posted about it in the winter, about how i loved singing it to luci. when the lyrics below were sang i just lost it:
I still believe in summer days.
The seasons always change
and life will find a way.
Ill be your harvester of light
and send it out tonight
so we can start again.
i think i needed a good cry to get out my range of emotions. it was brief but felt good, a culmination of the day and making sure everything was perfect, luci turning one, family celebrating and the realization that time goes by too fast.
with that said, i'll never let trav party harty the night before a big family event again or i'll end up pissed at him and also, i think next year we'll order pizza. :)
Saturday, July 18, 2009
after much resistance
i opened a facebook page. we're pitching "social media" to our clients right and left, it's the thing to do in PR now. i was being quite the hypocrite holding out.
i also now twitter for my agency.
it's a lot to wrap your mind around and quite frankly, it annoys me. i find it quite self indulgent. some might say this blog is self indulgent and i guess it is in many ways, but this was started to keep a record of luci's life for first and foremost me and then those who are interested. i have really wrestled with the fact that it's a public forum to be judged and that i am "a mommy blogger" (hate that term) but i realize the good of this record outweighs the bad and that's all there is to it. but facebook and twitter and all the "real time" updating is a little much for me! i get a lot of it and it works for self promotion and getting the word out about your product or service or what you're interested in. there is no denying that. but the mundane "i'm going to the gym and then to dinner" updates are just ridiculous to me... but i'm adapting to the times. i have to!
i've followed blogs for personal reasons for months, but now i'm following blogs for business purposes. diving in head first into social media is daunting, but i'm trying to absorb everything i read so i can leverage it in the best advantage of my clients. i'm also thinking about forming another blog that is less personal and more to gain followers and promote, again in the interest of my clients. honestly, i can't imagine adding one more task to my day, but i think it's necessary. I can't stand being behind in my industry and social media has evolved so fast, I have to evolve with it.
however, i want to keep this blog pure and for and about luci. i type without thinking and put my thoughts out there like a diary, but a public one. it's been therapeutic and fun and i'm so happy i keep it. i just don't want to combine my work life with my personal life anymore than i already do.
anyway, if you're on facebook, please "friend" me! like i said i'm diving in head first!
i also now twitter for my agency.
it's a lot to wrap your mind around and quite frankly, it annoys me. i find it quite self indulgent. some might say this blog is self indulgent and i guess it is in many ways, but this was started to keep a record of luci's life for first and foremost me and then those who are interested. i have really wrestled with the fact that it's a public forum to be judged and that i am "a mommy blogger" (hate that term) but i realize the good of this record outweighs the bad and that's all there is to it. but facebook and twitter and all the "real time" updating is a little much for me! i get a lot of it and it works for self promotion and getting the word out about your product or service or what you're interested in. there is no denying that. but the mundane "i'm going to the gym and then to dinner" updates are just ridiculous to me... but i'm adapting to the times. i have to!
i've followed blogs for personal reasons for months, but now i'm following blogs for business purposes. diving in head first into social media is daunting, but i'm trying to absorb everything i read so i can leverage it in the best advantage of my clients. i'm also thinking about forming another blog that is less personal and more to gain followers and promote, again in the interest of my clients. honestly, i can't imagine adding one more task to my day, but i think it's necessary. I can't stand being behind in my industry and social media has evolved so fast, I have to evolve with it.
however, i want to keep this blog pure and for and about luci. i type without thinking and put my thoughts out there like a diary, but a public one. it's been therapeutic and fun and i'm so happy i keep it. i just don't want to combine my work life with my personal life anymore than i already do.
anyway, if you're on facebook, please "friend" me! like i said i'm diving in head first!
Thursday, July 16, 2009
happy birthday lucia dee
"On the night you were born, the moon smiled with such wonder that the stars peeked in to see you and the night wind whispered 'life will never be the same.' Because there had never been anyone like you...ever in the world."
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
more tears
today erica, luci's babysitter for the past year, brought over a first birthday present consisting of an awesome double disc cd of children's songs and a swing. so very thoughtful and appropriate considering i told her that while i love playing my "cool" music for luci hoping to influence her music taste, what really gets her going are the ridiculous and annoying (to me) songs that her toys play- the real kid stuff. the beatles just don't cut it yet.
she also took the time to write out a beautiful card to luci that i couldn't even read because the tears welled so quickly i had to shut it. when i finally mustered up the courage to open the card again, erica's words melted and broke my heart at the same time.
she's been such a blessing this past year and truly loves luci. i am so bummed she is graduating and moving on.
we have found her replacement though, a cute little hippie chick that is erica's current roommate! she seems great and i'm sure we'll love her too. but we'll really miss erica.
erica also gave me the idea to write my own little beautiful message to luci for her first birthday and for every birthday thereafter. handwritten and from the heart. (because i still believe in the power of a handwritten note even though my writing is similar to that of a serial killer's.) not posted on this blog, because i think it's too personal for that.
i'll write it tonight, on the eve of her birthday and seal it for later, when it will mean something to her as well.
plus i could never read it aloud just yet, i'd be a blubbering mess.
she also took the time to write out a beautiful card to luci that i couldn't even read because the tears welled so quickly i had to shut it. when i finally mustered up the courage to open the card again, erica's words melted and broke my heart at the same time.
she's been such a blessing this past year and truly loves luci. i am so bummed she is graduating and moving on.
we have found her replacement though, a cute little hippie chick that is erica's current roommate! she seems great and i'm sure we'll love her too. but we'll really miss erica.
erica also gave me the idea to write my own little beautiful message to luci for her first birthday and for every birthday thereafter. handwritten and from the heart. (because i still believe in the power of a handwritten note even though my writing is similar to that of a serial killer's.) not posted on this blog, because i think it's too personal for that.
i'll write it tonight, on the eve of her birthday and seal it for later, when it will mean something to her as well.
plus i could never read it aloud just yet, i'd be a blubbering mess.
Monday, July 13, 2009
cute cuties
just two lil buddies on a wagon ride.
now getting pushed by daddies on a swing.
back in the wagon.
nola enjoying luci's sippy while lu stuffs her face with nola's bowl of puffs and cheerios.
hungry little mongrels looking like nick and i after school at my parent's on any given day, gorging ourselves.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
chi town
the wedding was wonderful, the weekend great.
i relaxed and surprised myself. i caught up with friends, saw people i hadn't in years and although i missed my girl, no tears were shed and i was ok.
that doesn't mean that i didn't set our alarm for 7 am this morning to get home. :)
i also managed to get severely drunk on friday. when i told travis i planned on catching a "heavy buzz" i by no means planned on doing that to the extent i did.
unfortunately, the below pictures say it all.
no pictures were taken beyond the first half hour of the reception. i am such a loser because i wanted some great shots of old friends.
i did manage to get the below two before red wine took over my brain. (which by the way, i'm retiring my wine glass and switching to vodka from now on. at least that is what i did on saturday night.)
the duo formerly known as "genitalia" (jen and tali) circa 2000-2003
and us with bill aka meathead, the groom and man of the hour.
it was a great time and it felt like old times. brunch and dinner with friends, laying in bed with erin on saturday (busie was sleeping) catching up and laughing, walks around the city (saunters i should say) and drinking way too much.
i relaxed and surprised myself. i caught up with friends, saw people i hadn't in years and although i missed my girl, no tears were shed and i was ok.
that doesn't mean that i didn't set our alarm for 7 am this morning to get home. :)
i also managed to get severely drunk on friday. when i told travis i planned on catching a "heavy buzz" i by no means planned on doing that to the extent i did.
unfortunately, the below pictures say it all.
no pictures were taken beyond the first half hour of the reception. i am such a loser because i wanted some great shots of old friends.
i did manage to get the below two before red wine took over my brain. (which by the way, i'm retiring my wine glass and switching to vodka from now on. at least that is what i did on saturday night.)
the duo formerly known as "genitalia" (jen and tali) circa 2000-2003
and us with bill aka meathead, the groom and man of the hour.
it was a great time and it felt like old times. brunch and dinner with friends, laying in bed with erin on saturday (busie was sleeping) catching up and laughing, walks around the city (saunters i should say) and drinking way too much.
luci and her uncle ryan
uncle ryan is not a natural when it comes to feeding babies as he wanted to give me a tortilla chip before his girlfriend julia said NO WAY!
but i love him anyway because he is my godfather even though my mommy says he's a fool!
me and my jidu
jealousy overcomes spoiled little girls when their jidu's hold other babies up north!
luci prefers being held by her jid alone thank you very much.
there's nothing like a jidu's leg to grind toes into while eating...
luci and her uncle justin
i like the rap music my uncle justin plays for me on his iphone because my mommy normally plays me more mellow stuff.
my uncle justin just picked me a flower and i picked it apart petal by petal.
come back inside uncle jud!
my uncle justin is a sucker because he catches me when i fling myself from chairs!
Thursday, July 9, 2009
freak out
so i'm having a bit of a freak out. we're going to chicago tomorrow for two nights. work is stressful. and above all... luci is about to turn one.
you see, i'd heard from my friends that the first birthday is a big one. a milestone that's bittersweet and it took me a while to get it. a few of my friends babies turned one around the time lu was born and they told me they experienced a rush of emotions leading up to the big day and i tried to understand, but i didn't. luci was a tiny baby. she was brand new. in my eyes, her first birthday was far away. i didn't have to think about it. well, i blinked and now it's here. my daughter is turning one.
the signs are there. people are telling me she's losing her baby look. she's getting more hair. i think she might walk soon; she actually took a step toward me today. her personality is shining through. she shakes her head no no no while doing the thing i'm telling her "no no no" about. i'm buying 18 month old clothes. she's getting so big.
this year has FLOWN by. more so than any other year in the history of my short existence. if anything, the greatest lesson i've learned from luci and in my time as a mom is that time is so precious and each phase passes so quickly. too quickly. as i nursed her tonight and laid her in bed, i had to fight back crocodile tears knowing i won't be nursing her forever or laying her little body in her bed. one day too soon, our nursing time will come to an end. it finally hit me recently that this little kicky baby/child is not going to need my nourishment and we won't have those precious minutes 4-5 times a day where she lays in my arms nursing and the rest of the world stops. there might come a day where she doesn't want to be held much. there WILL come a day when she will want nothing to do with me and would rather spend her time with her friends. she'll go to kindergarten and college and fantasize about moving far far away from me, the thought of her mother missing her the farthest thing from her mind (as it was in my own mind only a few years ago). those thoughts make me never want to let her go.
as her pending birthday approaches, i finally get it. why the first birthday is such a milestone, one of sadness and joy. joyful in the fact that we are so blessed, that my life is so much greater now that i have luci. however, it's sad too, knowing that as my child grows and ages, so do i. that life is precious and short. that if i could, i'd keep extending this year on and on and on. you know, all the things we've heard for years but finally come to understand once we're parents.
i know i've been holding her a bit more often these past few days, kissing her a bit too much. i even rocked her to sleep this afternoon. i couldn't let her go knowing that too soon, her first year of life will be a memory. i hope i can always keep it fresh in my mind. to always remember how happy this year has been, and how big my heart has grown.
you see, i'd heard from my friends that the first birthday is a big one. a milestone that's bittersweet and it took me a while to get it. a few of my friends babies turned one around the time lu was born and they told me they experienced a rush of emotions leading up to the big day and i tried to understand, but i didn't. luci was a tiny baby. she was brand new. in my eyes, her first birthday was far away. i didn't have to think about it. well, i blinked and now it's here. my daughter is turning one.
the signs are there. people are telling me she's losing her baby look. she's getting more hair. i think she might walk soon; she actually took a step toward me today. her personality is shining through. she shakes her head no no no while doing the thing i'm telling her "no no no" about. i'm buying 18 month old clothes. she's getting so big.
this year has FLOWN by. more so than any other year in the history of my short existence. if anything, the greatest lesson i've learned from luci and in my time as a mom is that time is so precious and each phase passes so quickly. too quickly. as i nursed her tonight and laid her in bed, i had to fight back crocodile tears knowing i won't be nursing her forever or laying her little body in her bed. one day too soon, our nursing time will come to an end. it finally hit me recently that this little kicky baby/child is not going to need my nourishment and we won't have those precious minutes 4-5 times a day where she lays in my arms nursing and the rest of the world stops. there might come a day where she doesn't want to be held much. there WILL come a day when she will want nothing to do with me and would rather spend her time with her friends. she'll go to kindergarten and college and fantasize about moving far far away from me, the thought of her mother missing her the farthest thing from her mind (as it was in my own mind only a few years ago). those thoughts make me never want to let her go.
as her pending birthday approaches, i finally get it. why the first birthday is such a milestone, one of sadness and joy. joyful in the fact that we are so blessed, that my life is so much greater now that i have luci. however, it's sad too, knowing that as my child grows and ages, so do i. that life is precious and short. that if i could, i'd keep extending this year on and on and on. you know, all the things we've heard for years but finally come to understand once we're parents.
i know i've been holding her a bit more often these past few days, kissing her a bit too much. i even rocked her to sleep this afternoon. i couldn't let her go knowing that too soon, her first year of life will be a memory. i hope i can always keep it fresh in my mind. to always remember how happy this year has been, and how big my heart has grown.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
4th pix
luci had an eventful weekend! she was surrounded by lots of family and friends and activity and most importantly, was at the center of every event we attended.
it seems as if her personality is coming out in major ways as of late. babbling is becoming constant and she even will say mama now! finally! she has learned to shake her head "no no no" and even mouths it in almost a mocking way when i tell her No! it's hard not to laugh. especially when everyone else around her is.
she has a new game of climbing onto furniture and flinging herself off backwards. she loves it. my brother justin is a sucker for it and caught her time and time again. she could fling herself for hours if she had her way. at home she tried it with me and i said no no no only for her to pitch a fit!
she's very social and charming. we went to dinner last night in oscoda and in walked a huge party of about 40 people. she immediately waved to greet them and as some of the men walked by, she held her little mitt up for high fives. they were all so tickled, which led me to believe they most definitely were all grandpas.
she loves kids, big and small and she played with lots of them this weekend!
below are some pix (complete with captions) from the hylens. forgive me as i'm not feeling witty. even though i was able to relax with lots of help from family, i still feel a bit wiped out from the travel and am happy to be home after four nights away. i finally get it when people say "i need a vacation after my vacation." which is an annoying thing to say (so you'll never hear me saying it) but i think i'll be in bed early tonight!
i took many more pix on my mom's camera upnorth and i'll have to upload those later....
it seems as if her personality is coming out in major ways as of late. babbling is becoming constant and she even will say mama now! finally! she has learned to shake her head "no no no" and even mouths it in almost a mocking way when i tell her No! it's hard not to laugh. especially when everyone else around her is.
she has a new game of climbing onto furniture and flinging herself off backwards. she loves it. my brother justin is a sucker for it and caught her time and time again. she could fling herself for hours if she had her way. at home she tried it with me and i said no no no only for her to pitch a fit!
she's very social and charming. we went to dinner last night in oscoda and in walked a huge party of about 40 people. she immediately waved to greet them and as some of the men walked by, she held her little mitt up for high fives. they were all so tickled, which led me to believe they most definitely were all grandpas.
she loves kids, big and small and she played with lots of them this weekend!
below are some pix (complete with captions) from the hylens. forgive me as i'm not feeling witty. even though i was able to relax with lots of help from family, i still feel a bit wiped out from the travel and am happy to be home after four nights away. i finally get it when people say "i need a vacation after my vacation." which is an annoying thing to say (so you'll never hear me saying it) but i think i'll be in bed early tonight!
i took many more pix on my mom's camera upnorth and i'll have to upload those later....
Monday, July 6, 2009
the 4th
i'm in oscoda at my parent's place with lu for a couple days. we came up here yesterday morning after a whirlwind couple of days on the lake with grandma and poppy in fenton.
i'm in a coffee shop working while lu naps (pathetic i know that i'm WORKING)and kathy w., a fam friend just sent me the below pic. i loved it because both my kids are in it! and for once i am too, just looking over them with love. :) the pic was taken earlier in the day before fireworks almost put me over the edge due to beatle's neurosis. that is another post in itself.
i'll post a million more when i sadly return to civilization in a couple days.
i'm in a coffee shop working while lu naps (pathetic i know that i'm WORKING)and kathy w., a fam friend just sent me the below pic. i loved it because both my kids are in it! and for once i am too, just looking over them with love. :) the pic was taken earlier in the day before fireworks almost put me over the edge due to beatle's neurosis. that is another post in itself.
i'll post a million more when i sadly return to civilization in a couple days.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
too cute
yesterday we went to visit newlyweds sarah (aka papps), will and maddie and noah at their new house. maddie who just turned 6 was absolutely enamored by luci. she bashfully asked me if she could hold her and of course i said yes, and immediately after i passed luci off, maddie swooped her up and out of the room, only for sarah to race after her and tell her to stay by us! lol
maddie fed lu her dinner and was the best little babysitter. we walked to the park across from their house and maddie insisted on pushing her in her stroller. sarah and will said it was a dream come true for maddie, being able to play with a real live baby doll! and while walking by the public pool in the park, one of maddie's friends saw her and waved "hi maddie!" only to make maddie feel even prouder to be showing off her new baby doll friend luci.
below are some cute shots:
not sure why trav's man hands are in the pic.
proud maddie, aka mini papps showing off her new novelty.
one seriously cute kid.
another seriously cute kid.
new buddies...
they aren't close enough in age to do any serious damage to society like papps and i, but i can see in a few years luci really thinking maddie is one of the coolest girls ever.
maddie fed lu her dinner and was the best little babysitter. we walked to the park across from their house and maddie insisted on pushing her in her stroller. sarah and will said it was a dream come true for maddie, being able to play with a real live baby doll! and while walking by the public pool in the park, one of maddie's friends saw her and waved "hi maddie!" only to make maddie feel even prouder to be showing off her new baby doll friend luci.
below are some cute shots:
not sure why trav's man hands are in the pic.
proud maddie, aka mini papps showing off her new novelty.
one seriously cute kid.
another seriously cute kid.
new buddies...
they aren't close enough in age to do any serious damage to society like papps and i, but i can see in a few years luci really thinking maddie is one of the coolest girls ever.
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